Ann Marie was in her last year of training to be a teacher when, on Christmas Day, she noticed a small red mark on her breast. Initially she thought it was a bump from playing frisbee with her kids, but something prompted her to make an appointment with her GP.
Ann Marie remembers sitting and waiting with her husband, Derek, for the results. Both were sure there was nothing to be worried about. But within a few weeks, Ann Marie had surgery to remove a tumour and had started the first of her 19 radiation treatments. Throughout this period, Ann Marie was still attending her final university lectures.
“My lecturer was so surprised to see me in class, when he knew I had surgery the week prior. But to be honest, the classes were a good thing to help take my mind off my treatment.”
It was during her first annual review that Ann Marie received devastating news. More cancer was found, but this time it was on the other side of her chest and had spread to her lymph nodes. Ann Marie was floored; she was not expecting it at all.
” It just didn't even enter my head that there would be something else somewhere else. It was probably naive. The first time I was diagnosed, I thought to myself, other people have gone through it, let's just deal with it. But this time, it was a heavy blow.”
“My mental well-being with it the second time around was so different to the first time. This time it was six months of chemotherapy including three months of the ‘Red Devil’ [common chemotherapy drug which is red in colour and has potentially strong side effects] and then three months of weekly Taxol. I had all my lymph nodes on the left side removed, and a complete hysterectomy after the chemotherapy was complete.”
For Ann Marie, the Wellness Centre was a haven.
“When you’re at home and the kids are at school, the days are very long. The Wellness Centre gave me purpose to get up and get out the door. Even if I had just one appointment or if there was one class, that kept me motivated.”
The first day Ann Marie used the Wellness Centre was one of the best days and worst days of her treatment. Prior to chemotherapy, Ann Marie had long grey hair, and while she rarely wears makeup, the thought of losing her hair was distressing. Hair loss is the clearest physical manifestation of what is going on inside. She looked through the Wig Library at the Wellness Centre and there was nothing appropriate. One of the Wellness Centre volunteers, Maureen, spent a long time searching for a wig that would suit. After a long wait, she gave Ann Marie a long grey wig – and as Ann Marie describes, everything changed.
“I said to myself, OK, let's do this. And that night I went home, Derek, I and the kids, shaved my hair. Knowing I had the wig just gave me the confidence to move forward. But you know the funny thing, I haven’t actually worn it once. “
Ann Marie did use many of the programs available at the Wellness Centre, including oncology massage, Look Good Feel Better, yoga, the under 50s support group and women’s cancer support group. She jokes she has a ‘frequent flyer’ card for all the services and support offered by the Wellness Centre. But perhaps the most valuable, were the conversations in the Wellness Centre with the other patients, the wonderful volunteers, and Simone, manager of the Wellness Centre.
“These conversations can be life changing, simply because nothing is off-limits, and you have conversations that you simply can’t have with people who have never been through it. “
“There is a calmness here. When everything else is spinning around after you’ve just had another appointment, and you’ve been told more news. This place allows you to sit and quietly process it. Think about yourself for a little bit. And then off we go again, back to parenting, and all the other things that we do.”
